And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
Two words: blizzard sex
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Randomize
