doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
