yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
So I answered the door in my underwear expecting my boyfriend. Instead I opened the door to Mormon missionaries. Do you think that was a sign from God?
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Randomize
