I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
Randomize