im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
