I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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