Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Randomize
