I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
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