I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
Randomize
