**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.
before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize
