You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
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