My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
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