in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
What the hell happened to my hand?
Well, you got in a fight with a cabbie while jaywalking, but we got you to walk away. The problem was 80 blocks away, when you punched a parked taxi for "running you over".
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
Randomize
