So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
Randomize
