Non-Jews are for practice
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
