honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
Randomize
