physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
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