Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
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