we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize
