I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
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