whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
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