The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
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