I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
Randomize
