these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
Randomize
