Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
