by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
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