Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
Randomize
