I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize
