So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
