I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
Randomize
