if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
Randomize