She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize