Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
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