ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
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