They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
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