So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
Randomize
