Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
Randomize
