I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
this hospital has no fireball
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
Do you remember whose house we're in?
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
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