I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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