just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
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