your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
We need to rekindle our bromance
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
Randomize
