I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize
