I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Randomize
