I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
Randomize
