To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize
