So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize
