In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
Randomize
