i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
Randomize
