i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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