doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
Randomize